


Masque

by Luka z Rivii (wayward_dream)



Series: 500 Milestone Prompts [9]
Category: The Witcher (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Hurt No Comfort, Jaskier has a past he doesn't talk about, Jaskier has secrets, Sad Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-11
Updated: 2020-04-11
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:07:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23586619
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wayward_dream/pseuds/Luka%20z%20Rivii
Summary: An encounter with an old friend forces you to realize you don't know Jaskier as well as you thought.
Relationships: Jaskier | Dandelion/Reader
Series: 500 Milestone Prompts [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1686445
Kudos: 16





	Masque

“Julian! Julian is that you?!”

Jaskier, who had been nuzzling at your ear and whispering about his plans for you that night just to see you blush, froze as the cry soared over the general ruckus of the crowded tavern.

“Jask?” you asked, touching his hand gently where it rested on the table. You frowned, noticing he suddenly looked uneasy. “What is it?”

“Nothing,” he said a bit too quickly. “Why don’t we get out of here darling?”

“But--”

Your protest was interrupted by a breathless voice. “Julian! By the gods, I thought I recognized that voice! How long has it been?” a beaming blonde plopped herself at your table seated opposite you and Jaskier and you looked at your lover in confusion. He was wearing a forced smile.

“Fancy seeing you here, Sephilia,” he said through his teeth.

“Jaskier?” you murmured, squeezing his hand. The bard looked at you and saw your confusion. He seemed to take a deep breath and then slump in defeat. He slid his hand out from under yours to grab his drink and you withdrew your hand to your lap, stung.

After taking a swig of ale Jaskier sighed. “Right. Y/N, this is Sephilia, an old friend of mine from my time at Oxenfurt. Sephilia, this is Y/N, my….um….this is Y/N.”

Your heart sunk as he hesitated to put a name to what the two of you had. You’d been sharing meals and beds and baths for over a fortnight now and you thought the two of you had a real connection, but it seemed he didn’t agree if he wouldn’t even say you were his lover. You looked down at your hands in your lap, which had at some point balled into fists around your skirt.

“Mm, nice to meet you. But  _ Julian, _ oh it’s so good to see you. You’ve become so famous, even your parents are impressed--”

“I don’t give a damn what they think,” Jaskier interrupted smoothly, and you heard the suppressed irritation in his tone.

_ He’s never told me about his family…..I didn’t even know he went to Oxenfurt, _ you thought to yourself bitterly. Your eyes stung as your thoughts churned but you were determined not to make a scene. You gritted your teeth.

“I’m rather tired, please excuse me,” you announced as you came to your feet abruptly, interrupting Jaskier’s stilted response to Sephilia’s bright chatter. You felt Jaskier’s eyes on you but you avoided his gaze as you set a few coins on top of the table for your meal and the drinks you’d consumed before quickly slipping away. You heard Sephilia’s laugh trill behind you and tears stung your eyes again as you shoved the tavern’s door open.

_ Don’t think so much, _ you tried to tell yourself as you began to walk in the direction of your cottage.  _ So he hasn’t told you everything about his past….so what? _

You thought of how she’d called him ‘Julian’, and you felt hollow and cold. You didn’t even know his real name. Gods, did you know  _ anything  _ about him, or were you just falling in love with a mask all this time?

You were so lost in your spiraling thoughts you didn’t hear the approaching footsteps.

You squealed in alarm when a hand seized your arm and spun you around, instinctively lashing out with your fingers curled into claws poised to slash at the face of your assailant--

Only for your wrist to be caught by nimble fingers, blue eyes gazing into yours with equal amounts of humor and concern.

“Easy, love, it’s only me,” Jaskier murmured.

“Y-you startled me. You shouldn’t sneak up on a girl, Jaskier,” you scolded him lightly. You took a deep breath and consciously made yourself relax, gently tugging your wrist and frowning when he didn’t release you. “Please release me.”

“No, if I do you’ll run from me again,” he said softly, guiding you closer until he could ensnare you in his arms. You brought your hands up intending to push him away, but instead they ended up just resting on his chest as you looked up at him. His gaze softened as he stared down at you. “What’s the matter, darling?”

“Nothing,” you lied, averting your gaze. His thumb swiped over your cheek gently.

“You’re an awful liar,” he told you fondly. “You’ve been crying.”

You frowned and touched your own cheek, and sure enough your fingers came away wet. “It’s….it’s nothing, Jaskier. Or should I call you Julian?”

You regretted the words as soon as they slipped bitter from your lips. Jaskier’s arms went tense around you and he sighed harshly.

“Are you upset about Sephilia? Because there’s no reason--”

“I only know the facade you put up,” you interrupted, finally gazing up at him with teary eyes. “Jaskier, Dandelion, the charming witty bard with a feral temper and a heart big enough to encompass the Continent. But that’s not….that’s not you, is it?”

Jaskier hesitated, and that was answer enough. You started to squirm out of his arms and he held onto you tighter. “It is! It’s part of me, anyways.”

“But there’s more beyond that,” you insisted. “Parts of you I don’t know, because you won’t let me.”

Jaskier was quiet for a moment, looking down at his feet before meeting your gaze again. “You know the parts I like best.”

“Those are pretty lies you fed to me, to make me trust and care for you. I thought we had something real, but all this time you’ve been feeding me pretty lies to make me trust and care for you, never letting me in, never letting me really  _ see you.”  _ You smiled despite the tears spilling from your eyes. “I love you, Jaskier. But I don’t even think I know who you really are, and I can’t make you happy. It’s….better I find out now.”

“Y/N,” he said quietly, desperation in his tone. “Please, let me make this right--”

You pried his hands off of your waist and stepped away, turning your back on his desolate expression. You wiped your eyes and set your shoulders.

It was a long and lonely journey home, feeling the weight of his eyes on you but refusing to look back. You stepped inside, shutting and locking the door with shaking hands. Then you leaned against it, sliding down to your knees on the floor as the sobs finally broke free.

**Author's Note:**

> If this hurt you, feel free to come yell at me on my Tumblr, @riviawitch3r :)


End file.
